Like so many others right now, I have been fighting the (hopefully) end of the winter maladies, just in time for the allergens from everything beautifully blossoming! It is now two weeks since I have been coughing, feverish, sneezing, wheezing (I must sound like the 7 Dwarfs) and just downright wonderful to encounter. Going from antibiotic to antibiotic, doctor to doctor, and making yet another trip to the Pharmacy has reminded me how fortunate I am when I am well and “into life.”
I love to embrace my life with both feet on the pedal, to awaken and “smell the coffee” and get the day going. It is not easy to have to face the reality that some germs can hold me hostage. No ransom to pay, I am just a prisoner until back to myself. I missed Aladdin, the school play where my two granddaughters were performing; serving at the Soup Kitchen twice; dinners with friends; writing at the computer; and the list goes on. Some of what I missed was mundane, and some I will never have an opportunity to revisit.
This is not meant to complain, this is meant to state the reality that we all have the lives we create, and expect to live…and then life interferes with these lives. For some, it will be a temporary illness, a setback, something that throws us a curve. For some, it will be a life-threatening and possibly catastrophic occurrence. Neither announces itself with much warning, I believe, and how we cope will very much make the difference in how we accept our fate.
Feeling better is the gift we can give ourselves. We may not feel the way we want, we may not feel the way we expect, we may not feel anything remotely familiar, but whether a new ostomate or recovering from pneumonia, our acceptance comes from the deepest part of ourselves, and the strongest!
You are an inspiration.
I wish you a very speedy recovery. You are amazing and your writing is beautiful. Thinking of you!!! Love, candi