My ostomy has given me a healthy life, and I want to share the positives. This is because it is easy to look at any with medical challenges as struggling or depressed, frustrated or unhappy. Even resentful comes to mind…why me? Here is the lowdown on life with an ostomy, the honest to goodness truth: I am healthier than I have ever been, and that makes me happier than I have ever been. The important piece of this is that I am not unique. Countless others feel exactly the same!
I am always checking in with other ostomates and so many have shared with me their “road to ostomy” and that road is not a pretty one. There may have been disease that destroyed or caused the removal of their organs; or dysfunction, such as dysmotility. They may have been pumped full of steroids that destroyed their bones. They may have been told by their physicians there is little to be done for them, or it is something they need to work with a psychiatrist because they need better mental health. At the very least, the majority were stuck somewhere in the medical maze, a very frightening and frustrating place to be. Finally having their ostomy changed so much of that.
The medical community seems to be recognizing that ostomy is a gift, a lifesaver, not a last resort, a failure of options, and that is so important. Years ago, we had a urologist speak to our Ostomy Support Group on urostomy (a diversion of urine stoma) and he was very engaging. The true engagement came, however, when he heard of the vibrant and successful lives ostomates were living. He turned to me and said he came to impart his knowledge, but came away having gained so much more…he shared his naivety in a very honest way. “I assumed I would see unhappy and limited people. But obviously, ostomy doesn’t keep you from living,” he told me. “Absolutely not,” I responded. “For most of us, it gave us back our lives.”
Is “beauty in the eyes of the beholder?” The first time I saw my stoma (I named Lily) I was shocked and frankly, overwhelmed with grief. I looked disfigured. But as soon as I embraced Lily’s ability to relieve my pain and fear, I was grateful and full of gratitude. For me, and other ostomates, as well as those who deal with other challenges, there is nothing more beautiful than a healthy outcome, as we recapture and live our best lives. THAT is the gift we have…appreciating the positives!
Appreciating the positives; NO TRUER WORDS CAN BE SAID!!!
Have a FUNtastic Memorial Day; you, and Lily also!!! (-:
Lonnie
You cease to amaze me, Ellyn that you come up so often with such positive words for us all to live by. You know I feel like you do and that I am so grateful that my doctor got me to the right place for my surgery and so grateful for the surgeon whom I adored … his name is dr. Kelly – so when it came time to name my stoma, I named it Kelly in honor of him. So glad he didn’t have a name I didn’t like ! ?
You cease to amaze me, Ellyn that you come up so often with such positive words for us all to live by. You know I feel like you do and that I am so grateful that my doctor got me to the right place for my surgery and so grateful for the surgeon whom I adored … his name is dr. Kelly – so when it came time to name my stoma, I named it Kelly in honor of him. So glad he didn’t have a name I didn’t like ! ?
So well-said and so very true Ellyn. I am so grateful that my ileostomy saved my life at a very young age and has given me a chance to live, to love, and to laugh. Hope the positive outlook you present will help many ostomates out there to be able to smell the roses again. ?
Not only have you embraced your life- saving ostomy, but you dedicate your life to guiding others by example and counseling to do the same. Bravo on a life well lived.
I’m 5 months with permanent Stoma (the bowel) side….
I had one back on 2000 but only while my J Pouch healed…. But after 23 years my pelvic muscles just gave up…. So I now have now an ostomy/stoma & I struggle each and everyday…..it’s very hard…
I understand it’s helps me live & I’m healthier but the depression side is a lot…. It’s overwhelming for me!
It’s great to read most of you are doing well…. Wish ALL well & good health…