Life is busy and complicated enough. Imagine awakening one morning with a pain that is intractable. As the morning goes on, the pain worsens and eventually, a trip to the Emergency Room is necessary. Recognizing your pain is getting even worse, you are stunned when the Triage nurse tells you to have a seat and wait until you are called. You wait, and you wait. Your symptoms worsen, your family member is pacing, and you are finally called. It is for your insurance cards and identification. “Have a seat and we will call you.” By now, you are feeling close to hysteria, your heart is pounding and you are in a sweat. Finally, your name is called and you are escorted back to be seen.
This scene is one that is so familiar, it makes me feel like crying. Not only was it a huge part of my life for years, but it is for so many each and every day. Not all painful experiences put someone smack in the middle of the medical community, but for those that do, it may be only the beginning of a trip down the yellow brick road that doesn’t lead you to believe you will meet the Wizard. It gives you the feeling your life is upended and not in a good way.
So, what is it about entering the medical community that is so frightening? Some say it is loss of control, or of independence, while others say there is a fear that is indescribable. “Will I be better after this experience?” “Will the medical community discover an issue that can’t be helped?” “Is this how my life will end?” Sadly, that fear sometimes prevents us from taking necessary action.
For those of us with chronic health issues, we are already primed with our “hospital bag” filled with ostomy supplies or whatever will prevent additional stress; an explanation of our health issue so time doesn’t have to be wasted; and perhaps, most important, an advocate with us. This person doesn’t have to be well-versed with our medical condition, simply have our well-being at heart. Their ability to ask for a warm blanket, hold our hand while awaiting test results, even make sure there is a remote to watch the television for distraction, are all invaluable.
For those who enter the medical world in an emergency, perhaps never having had health issues, this is a time to recognize how necessary it is to stay as calm as possible. There will be a great deal that happens that is new and foreign, and quite frightening. Your advocate should gather themselves enough to get a paper and pen to take notes; reinforce your need to remain calm; trust the medical community has your best interest at heart and has a history of managing situations like yours; know that there is a Patient Bill of Rights that insists you are well-managed; rest and keep your heart rate as regular as possible; ask for help as needed; and most of all, remember, this is a time to recognize that you are not in charge, which is actually, when you are in an acute situation, a huge relief.
I can remember going through this type of experience very similar to what you described above.
I have also been the advocate for my son and grandsons more than one time, and that was a true challenge also.
The key to either situation you are in is exactly what you said above, and that of course is to remain calm and patient at all times if possible.
Thanks for the reminders; it’s been a few years since my last emergency visit. I only hope I can remember your great advice the next time I have to again for an emergency at a hospital.
Excellent description and reminiscent of many days and nights. May be blessed to never have to go through that again!
I go thru very often and it never gets easier. Including last nights 7 hour trip the ER while on vacation.
Your message is so relevant in our unpredictable times – just two days ago I made up a new “hospital bag” and I just hope not to have to use it anytime too soon !