SOAKING IN LOVE

In the interest of full disclosure, I had never thought about Soaking in Love. It is a beautiful metaphor for the warmth I feel when I am with my family and my special friends. I feel a glow that is rather indescribable. My daughter, Emily Golden

, used the expression in one of her podcasts (she is extremely prolific, having two businesses, Golden Resources and Dethroning Your Inner Critic) and it truly resonated with me. My visual, a gorgeous vessel in a garden of the most aromatic flowers and vines, wrapping around me an intoxicating fragrance as I sit until ready to emerge with all of my senses awakened, knowing I am treasured and warmed in a most exquisite way. That would be my definition of Soaking in Love. And I suppose for each of us the imagery would be unique, unique to what we want in our lives, and what we will do to achieve it.

Recently, I was a Visitor at the hospital where I have had the predominance of my surgeries. I know it as well as possible, considering it changes constantly. However, my visits there bring me to a peace, since having been there consistently for years while I was so very sick, I now feel that I bring confidence to patients that there is a world after illness. The visit to this recent ostomate seemed, on the surface, rather predictable, and since I only got the request to visit her the day before, I was “squeezing it in” between many errands on a busy day.

We spoke for a while and she told me she had been in the hospital for close to three months before having her ileostomy, which is now three weeks old. She was fearful she would not be able to care for it at home, she was fearful her new status would impose upon her family, since they may need to help her, since she was the one used to helping, and she was fearful she wasn’t up to coping with her new anatomy. So far, other than the length of time she has been hospitalized, everything was, well, rather predictable. Most of us have gone through the same emotions while adjusting to our new life.

I presented my card to her with my phone number and email address, encouraging her to please reach out as issues arose in which ever way she felt most comfortable. I then pointed out that I am a writer and pointed to my website where my weekly blogs are published. Her eyes lit up as she told me she is a published book writer…and her first book was about what put her in the hospital and led to her ostomy. I wanted to know more, and she revealed a harrowing story of her childhood. My heart broke as she described what for many would keep us from wanting to awaken ever again. But she is a fighter, a survivor and a woman of incredible strength.

I leaned over her bed and wrapped my shaking arms around her shoulders and reminded her she is safe now. I reminded her she has given so much to her family and it is their time to give to her. And most importantly, I reminded her she can imagine herself soaking in all their love, in that beautiful vessel, enwrapped in the most aromatic floral vines.

It is not my place to share with you her story, but if I get permission to give the name of her book, I will gladly do so. There are amazing people among us, and she is one of them!