As you can see, that is the front cover of my journal, my Gratitude Journal. In the interest of transparency, I am not a meditation lady, and that is not to say I don’t wish I was. However, I move too quickly for that, and to my detriment, I don’t turn off the volume in my head enough to simply let go and just “be.” Even when I do yoga, I am less aware of my breathing than anyone in the room, I am certain. So although my daughter, Emily, has been writing in her Gratitude Journal for a long time, and even referenced her habit of writing in her journal while her coffee is brewing each morning, I had no intention of joining her in that practice.
While wandering the stationery aisle of the store, looking for Valentine’s Day cards, however, I glanced up to find a book that was very attractive. The front cover told me in no uncertain terms that THIS IS WHERE FUN HAPPENS and therefore, I felt it my responsibility to make fun happen. Here was my perfect opportunity to begin my Gratitude Journal…the perfect size, the perfect title, the perfect bright colors, and I found the perfect purple marking pen. I was ready to begin.
That night, I ruminated about what I would write in my new journal. It felt a little amorphous, writing into the clouds since I don’t anticipate anyone will ever read it. But the more I thought about it, I felt so liberated, knowing this was my opportunity to be honest and clear with myself, and at the same time, appreciate my gifts.
Taking my purple marker in hand, I wrote the date the following day, this first day of the rest of my life. Line one began, “I am grateful” and my brain stopped working. Oh, no, what am I grateful for? And then the flood of thoughts began. And they flowed, and they flowed some more, and before I knew it, my contract with myself to write 5 sentences daily was complete for day one.
Day two brought a slight tremor to my hand when I opened the journal to write. “What if I can’t find something to write?” My fear of failure was really on overdrive, and I had to take control of my critical inner voice. Opening the book to page two, picking up my purple marker, I thought of my first affirmation about which I was grateful, and once again, the five statements were written.
By day three, I no longer even thought about my ability to express my gratitude…it just flowed from my marker onto the page. I am grateful for my family and friends, for the color of the sky, for the health of those I love, for the ability to write my thoughts and feelings; for the camaraderie and loving support of the Ostomy Support Groups I facilitate, for the resilience of the human spirit, for the joy of doing a crossword puzzle or my favorite morning brain exercise, the daily cryptoquotes. I am grateful for the beauty of the snow, and then grateful when it is shoveled and plowed so I do not have to deal with it. I am grateful for my wonderful medical team, and most grateful when I don’t have to see them. I am grateful that I can stay inside nice and warm during the winter chill, and grateful that I can leave when I so desire. I have come to realize that depending upon how I look at life, I am grateful for both sides.
Consider joining me in beginning a Gratitude Journal and getting in touch with your attitude of gratitude! Only 5 short sentences will open your mind and your heart. It is such a nice way to begin your day, no deep breathing or sitting in one position required. Just let your mind wander to what puts a smile on your face, and recognize how fortunate you truly are.
Ellyn,
I’ve been doing a “verbal gratitude journal” of sorts.
You’ve inspired me to put pen to paper!
xo Laura
Yes. I actually look forward to it now. Great feeling to start the day! We all have so much to be grateful!