HOW DO I GO ON?

My initiation into the world of medical issues came upon me out of the blue in my early 40s and continued for decades. I was caught in the web of ER’s and OR’s for over 20 years between my first major small bowel obstruction and ileostomy. My stoma came as a huge relief, as well as a life-changer for the better. Many, however, are blind-sided and mystified, angry and disappointed in their bodies post-ostomy surgery. The questions I receive from new ostomates are frequently the same: How do I go on?

As you know from reading my blogs, I always do my best to meet people where they are, and that includes those with any issue. I am far from a professional, but I do know that a good listener can be more helpful than an expert at times and that finding a place to begin a dialog is most important.

So, that takes me back to the question, “How do I go on?” I am always amazed at how little faith we tend to have in ourselves. Beginning to “peel back the layers of the onion,” metaphorically, most will tell me they are unprepared for a life and body change. However, the more we talk, the more we find that moment in their lives when they knew how resilient they truly were, and we build from there. It may be a medical crisis or terrible loss that caused deep introspection. Or supporting another in their time of need. But either way, there is suddenly recognition of strength and determination, and I feel the positive energy entering their mind and body.

Each piece of the puzzle of reclaiming one’s life after an enormous challenge or upheaval is important, and sometimes all that matters is getting started. Opening the box to the puzzle, again, metaphorically, means being ready to look at the options involved. Often, a Support Group is the most valuable first piece, anchoring the others. Learning from those with similar issues, finding interlocking tactics, establishing plans, and having a network to ask questions means everything when actually entering a new world.

Resilience is our Super Power when we are put in a frightening situation, and none of us will go through life without needing to don our cape with the capital R. If I can guide you in any way, it would be to reach out to others who have been there before, know how strong and resourceful you are, and be there for others who will need your support in the future!